Binghamton Adventures, HO!

This is, by no means, a thorough visual account of what happened on my recent trip to Binghamton, NY...
It's just a composite of my adventures!
Still, I'll draw you a picture with my words that will be magical...

So, here's the deal:
I had been planning and commiserating with my friend Carrie for several months about how I would get myself from DenvCO to Binghamton for what is sure to be known as the best cocktail party in Binghamton, NY history.

Finally, I sucked it up, despite my fear of navigating my lame ass through New York City proper, and ordered a ticket east coast bound!

The culmination of this trip provided for a lot nervousness and excitement - how could it not! I hadn't seen Carrie, Paul, and Franklin for 2 years.


When the day finally arrived, Mama Kel, angel that she is, carted me to the airport and bought me THE BEST breakfast burrito ever.
BLESS HER FOREVER because that was pretty much the only thing I ate that day!

We saw this weird van on the drive to the airport.

I was flying standby (THANK YOU AUNT CHARLENE!!!) and was nervous that I wouldn't make my flights, but I must be doing something right because I caught every plane without any extreme incident.

On my flight from Denver to Baltimore...I met Mike.
Mike was about my father's age and was kind enough to ply me with bloody marys as we shot the shit throughout the 4 hour flight!
Mike was right on and gave me his business card and offers to help me along if I got stuck anywhere. What a peach of a pear, right?!


Baltimore to NYC was less exciting, but I survived on cheese crackers and my iPod.

I became exceedingly more exhausted and was only rejuvenated with alcohol.
Weird, right?

Upon landing, I managed to maneuver from La Guardia to a bus that took me to Port Authority on 42nd St. in NYC.
It was sort of an adventure...
Still, I had made arrangements to have a brief hangout with my cousin Minnie and I was totally psyched about it!

Um, HELLO MINNIE!
She's totally cute, right! And she's game for chugging Coors Light tallboys!
Yeah, we're family!

We also ate some really terrible pizza, but we gabbed and chewed and chugged and I regretted not spending more time in the city because Minnie is a dream!

Seriously, I can't wait to see her again!

Shortly after this picture was taken, Minnie deposited me in front of my bus to Binghamton and I trudged onto the bus with the remainder of my tallboy and a commitment to making it to Binghamton if it killed me!

It almost did.

You know when you get on a partially full mode of transportation and everyone sits in the best seats and relegates you to the shitty ones...
Well, I picked the least offensive seat partner and hunkered down.
The seat was adjusted in a way that made every part of my butt fall asleep and it was too dark in the bus to adjust it...so, I just writhed and wriggled - allowing blood to the portions of my bum that was slowly dying.

The bus driver went over the rules, one of them being not drinking booze on the bus, and I was forced to slam the beer with encouraging texts from Minnie on her way to party in Chelsea.

The bus ride was sort of tortuous, but let me say...the pay off was worth it.
Still, about 15 minutes outside of Binghamton...someone vommed.
Yeah, first a woman was rushing past me to the front of the bus...and the smell of digestion followed her.

Thankfully, when I stepped off the bus, I saw Carrie's car, then Carrie, and soon I was hugging her and in her car laughing!
One of the first things out of her mouth was, "Do you want to go get a drink?".
And clearly, that was all I wanted to do!

We stopped at the Belmar and holy shit...if you're ever in Binghamton, NY...GO TO THE GOD DAMN BELMAR.

First, the Belmar is #5 on Jameson's list of most Jameson sold in the US.
This is a whiskey bar and they take their Jameson seriously!
Second, they serve Yeungling...and that shit is so damn dreamy...
Third, the owners, clientele, and just about everything about the bar rules. There was live music, kind peeps to shoot the shit with, and amazing bartenders that keep a cold beer in front of you!

Carrie and I spent a good portion of the time catching up, laughing, talking to people, and drinking...
And the best part, you ask? BARS CLOSE AT 3 IN BINGHAMTON!

We made lots of friends and by the end of it I wanted to move to Binghamton...a sentiment I continue to feel even now!

After the Belmar, Carrie and I toddled home...right around the corner from the Belmar and I got to see their beautiful home!

All I can say, regardless of how corny it sounds, is it's totally heartwarming to see some of your favorite people in the world in a settled and secure place.

It's also heartwarming to know that the ever talented Paul Myers has left you a note detailing a sandwich, made just for you, so divine that you almost die of over drooling just reading it!

Paul Myers! I'm honored to know you!

Carrie prepared my sandwich...
And we giggled over Dog Dick V - the issue Carrie had contributed to, but had never seen!

Audrey was there holding it down!

Yes, that is a Cuban sandwich with a light salad!
I ate that at 4 in the morning and poured myself into bed dreaming of the adventures to come!

And boy did we have adventures...
I was awoken, at an indecent hour, by the sweetest little knocks and someone softly saying, "Backy", "Backy"....

That someone was Franklin Blaise!
Dreamboat! I mean, look at that kid! Can you believe it!?

I've known this little munchkin since the day he was a glimmer in his Mom's eyeball...and he's just grown to be such a delight. A sassy, smart, and charming little devil!

The plan, on that day, was to see a bit of the city, get a hair cut for Frank and a bang trim for Carrie, and drop Frank off at his grandparents house before the aforementioned cocktail party!

Two things:

Binghamton is friggin' ridic cold in winter...

Binghamton is charming in a way that I'd never known before.
Sure, there is some indications of the tough economic times, but there's a established integrity, a historical presence, and a sense of perseverance and practicality that was so appealing to me.

I'd never been to upstate New York before and was totally won over by the kind people, their generous manner, and the "something" that I'll never be able to define.

It's so pretty...I wish I could be there in fall...the city is surrounded by scores of trees!

We hit Shear Magic so Carrie and Frank could get beautiful...


Holy fuggin' cute, right?!

Carrie and I discussed how I should buy the Cameo theater and we'd create a rad venue for cool stuff.
Anyone wanna subsidize our plan?!

We stopped at Rolando's!

My breakfast was delish, but when I offered some to Carrie...she balked.
She's never eaten white gravy before!

After breakfast, we headed to Carrie's childhood home and, wow, it was amazing!

It was in the woods...surrounded by beautiful scenery!

Mama!

Frankie B!

Carrie's parents are just the nicest people ever!
We sat down at the kitchen table, drank a Yeungling, and chatted before leaving Franklin there for errands and party prep!

Thank you, Blabacs, for your hospitality!


Carrie and I ran to the grocery and liquor store.
I loved these "No Nonsense" pajamas...

And every checkout lane has a friggin' TV!

After we picked up the booze, Carrie and I stopped at THE BEEF.
It wasn't open, but when we walked in...the lady just said, "Come in, we're not open".
She promptly made us two cocktails and we chatted with her until we couldn't possibly avoid any further diversion from the party!

The party was imminent and Carrie had dressed the whole house in holiday greenery. Holly and pine branches everywhere!

The tree was trimmed...

The POZOLE was simmerin'!
And let me just say, it is the BEST pozole I have EVER had in my entire life!

The brie was wrapped delicately in pastry...

Crostini was toasted...
Um, are you dying of jealousy yet?!

The spread was gorgeous!

The bar was stocked and there was a wine barrel crowded with gorgeous wine bottles!

Oxtail Terrine.
Yeah, I said it.

Chicken liver pate.
Stop dying.

And all of it made by this dear, talented, and brilliant man!

Note the talisman Paul is wearing...

It's a blinged out eagle with a ruby eye...
Paul needed a little something and I couldn't walk away from the thrift store Carrie and I stopped at...and not buy it for him!

The birds being held by Paul are a couple of pieces that Carrie couldn't live without.
And by live without, I mean, she broke one and had to buy the pair.

Things wound down, revelers exited, and it was just a select crew of peeps laughing by the fire and sipping cocktails.

Carrie and I whipped out the Dog Dick and schooled some bitches.
AMAZING.

By the end, I didn't want to ever leave Binghamton! I love these people! I want them near me forever!

However, time flies and the next morning I felt like something had crawled in me and died.
I'm sure it had nothing to do with the champagne cocktails, vodka drinks, and red wine...

Thankfully, Paul Myers (DREAM CHEF EXTRAORDINAIRE) cooked up a sort of mexi-benedict with pozole and the perfectly poached egg on toasted and buttered bread. It was effing beautiful!

After breakfast and a pretty healthy dose of pain reliever...We all loaded into the Myers' car to go see Santa and go to the museum where Carrie works!

Frank was absolutely dreamy...
New haircut, cute overalls, and his very proper and matter fact demeanor!

He chatted with Santa with his hands folded neatly and as he got off Santa's lap, he said, "I'll see you next week!".
I fell in love!

Carrie gave us a tour of the mansion that is connected to the museum...
It was gorgeous and had tons of taxidermy marvelousness!

Papa and baby!

Wild munchkin!


Tour guide...

After the mansion, we looked at trains, and then hit The Spot for dinner.
I had a fantastic gyro and ended up in bed with Carrie and Frank cuddled up watching "Up".

The next day was a lot of the same as before...rushing around getting back and forth and finally arriving in DenvCO at around 11 PM.

Saying goodbye sucked. Thinking about it now bums me out.

But, like I said before, it's heartwarming to see your friends doing well and breathing again!

And here's the thing, that necklace...it was the most appropriate gift...because these people are a family of phoenix.
They are rising from the ashes and their feathers are gorgeous and sparkling! Their eyes are ruby red and shining!

I love you Myers clan...I love you all more than my ability to express!
Thank you!

And thank you Binghamton, NY...I'll be back!